The New Year Baby

I am officially a mother of two. Yup, I am responsible for keeping two little human beings alive and happy. It's sort of bizarre when I stop to think about it. It seems like just last week that I was just a laid back college student who sometimes questioned whether or not I wanted to do that whole "married with kids" thing. Turns out, I did. Now I have two little minions who NEED me 24/7. It's exhausting and frustrating and amazing and rewarding all rolled into one. I swear my newborn is afraid of the dark and only wants to be awake when I want to sleep. And my toddler, whose favorite words are "no" and "stop," wants to try to pick up said newborn and put him in his toy car. It's chaos, but at least it can be fun and we will find our routine again soon, right? Oh, and my Master's thesis is due next month. So if you see me around town anytime soon (a rare occasion these days), no, I have not been punched in the face recently and yes, the circles under my eyes are really that dark.

Let's do things in order, shall we? First up: Bennett's 2nd birthday party! We had a "Barnyard Birthday Bash" for our animal-loving two-year-old! And after getting way too much stuff for Christmas, he got even more toys to pile on to his collection! Bennett had tons of fun with his little guests. Toddler parties are hilarious. They are all very helpful when it comes to opening presents and playing with the new toys. I was surprised to watch Bennett be so kind and patient, even when another kid would take a toy he was playing with or rip open his present for him. He was so cool about it! He would just sit back and wait. You could tell he was a little antsy, but for a toddler, I was impressed. It's funny how kids can be so different around other people, then when they are home alone, it is another story. His favorite birthday toy was a truck and trailer to pull little horses in. As soon as the party was over, he was walking around holding it saying, "Mine! My truck!" He was very proud of it and was sure to let all the adults know, now that all the toddlers were gone, that it was his!

There was cake. There was ice cream. Chocolate milk. "Chicken Feed." I had a lot of fun planning the party, but I'm glad I had my family here to help set it all up. I was exhausted afterwards... and actually went into labor that night. But more on that later...

Right after Bennett's party, my mom, sister, and I went out to get pedicures! For some reason, this just happens to be the thing that works for me when it is time to have a baby! After the pedicures, we finished cleaning up, there may have been a small nap in there somewhere, my sister and I started our "baby" puzzle (gotta do something while waiting), then some contractions started!

And here he is! Meet our town's New Year Baby! 

Waylan Scott

Apparently, in a small town, the New Year Baby doesn't always come on New Year's Day! It was technically a long labor (about 24 hours), but pretty uneventful until the end. Our second son, Waylan Scott, was born on January 4th at exactly 11 pm. With how long we waited for him to get here, we were thinking he was going to be born on big brother's birthday. Just one hour from it!

Big Brother!

Bennett turned two the next day. I felt kind of bad that his mommy and daddy were stuck in the hospital on his birthday, but he got to come up and meet his baby brother for the first time! And he also had his Teta Aummie to keep him busy so it's not like he wasn't entertained!

More on my now two-year-old: Bennett loves all things dogs, horses, cows, trucks, and dinosaurs. All boy. He is stringing together several words now. Not always a coherent sentence, but that's why he had mommy to be his translator! He has a large vocabulary, but a lot of his words have silly pronunciations. For example, he calls dinosaurs "diamonds." Not sure how that sounds like dinosaurs to him, but at least he is trying, right? Horse is "hoy." Truck went from "duck" to "fruck." And cow sounds like "meow." He sure does have down "no" and "stop" really well. He refuses to say please, the little booger, but he always says "hanks" when you give him something. It's stinkin' adorable. He also likes to fake burp and say "eh'me" ("excuse me") right after. Of course that cracks both Jeff and me up. The kid LOVES being

outside and would run out naked in a snow storm if we let him. Seriously. I've had to explain to him that he can't go out in the backyard with the dogs when it is 30 degrees outside in nothing but a diaper. Speaking of diapers, we sort of suspended the formal potty training, but plan to pick that up again next month. He'll still potty in the toilet, but refuses to go #2 in it. I haven't really been making him even go to the toilet the last couple of weeks, but just yesterday he walks into my room, takes off his diaper, and goes and sits on our toilet and pees. When he was done he flushed, then came to me and held out his hand and said "have." Haha, he knows that going in the toilet gets him a treat! Speaking of treat, the boy things he is a dog still. He purposely puts things on the floor to eat them, tries to lick himself and others like our dogs, and has actually copied off Maggie when she is chasing shadows on the wall. He is a mess. It's funny, but at the same time gross! I know that kids are copy-cats, but this kid takes his mocking to the extreme! If I scratch my nose or run my fingers through my hair a certain way, Bennett will do his best to copy me exactly. Again, funny, but scary! I really need to watch my mouth, actions, and temper around this kid! Unfortunately, I can't tell him to copy just the good habits because he doesn't know any better. He is certainly a handful (I hear two-year-olds can be), but he keeps me on my toes and helps me to take a look at things I know I need to work on (did I mention I might have a temper?).

Overall, Bennett is really doing such a great job as a big brother. There are times when he freaks me out because he wants to kiss on Waylan or pat on his head too hard, but I suppose that comes with the toddler territory. You can tell that he loves him. He's jealous sometimes and wants to be held a lot more, or as he says, "hoed! hoed!" But I'm sure it could be worse. He really tries to be helpful by trying to pick up the baby when he cries or getting out all his diapers and wipes, but I've learned to divert that helpfulness and gave him a bottle and cloth diaper to use with his teddy (aka "Ted"). He tries to change Ted's diaper, put him in the swing, and rock him. I'm super surprised he hasn't tried to breastfeed him yet, haha! Because he tried to breastfeed his toy dinosaur one day and then lifted his shirt and offered a crying Waylan his bare chest the next. Sweet Waylan is so patient, too. He just sleeps through Bennett poking at him and kissing on him. And when he fusses because he wants to be changed or fed, he doesn't go into an all out non-stop bawling fest right away. He'll cry a bit then stop and either go back to sleep or wait for me to respond. It gives me time to deal with Bennett and get him occupied or fed or changed, whatever needs done that second, before I pick up Waylan. He's such a good little brother! Minus that fact that he likes to party all night and sleep all day...

I'll post more about my long, initially boring (but not without ridiculous pain at the end), natural, and unmedicated birth later. Overall, it was a crazy, wonderful experience that ended in another beautiful, perfect little boy. Jeff and I couldn't be happier and have been blessed with two adorable boys that we get to love on for the rest of our lives. :)

Love my boys!

That's a Wrap!

The Christmas wrapping paper is all cleaned up and the birthday paper is on its way in! I can't believe 2014 is already over, while at the same time I am so ready for 2015. It is going to be an exciting and busy year. Bennett will be turning two next week and his little brother is due to make his appearance very soon! They could very well share a birthday, but we will see!

2014 seemed to both fly by and drag at times. It's been a busy year for me as I've been working on my Master's and cooking a baby. I know it's because I'm nearing the end and I'm uncomfortable, but I feel like I've been pregnant the whole year! We've been in Oklahoma a whole year now, Jeff is loving his new position, and we have an awesome new church family we have had the chance to get to know. This year hasn't been perfect, but it has certainly not been boring and has been full of many blessings. From finding out we were pregnant again (a surprise for a couple who struggled with fertility issues before our first), to getting through our first crazy summer with the FBC youth, to Jeff's first mission trip to Africa, and even finding out Jeff's dad had to deal with skin cancer but was able to get rid of it with one surgery (praise the Lord!). There is always something going on in the Barros family and we are beyond blessed in so many ways.

This pregnancy has been a little more trying than my last. Which is probably why it seems to have lasted so long! With a toddler to chase and late nights working on homework, I feel like I have been exhausted for most of 2014. The great thing is that this pregnancy has had zero complications. With Bennett, I had high blood pressure towards the end. This time, aside from the ridiculous pelvis pain, my blood pressure and everything has been great! I'd like to just get through Bennett's birthday party this weekend, then the little guy is welcome to join us whenever he would like! I'm ready for him anytime, but I told my family that unless I'm pushing out a baby at noon this Saturday, we are having Bennett's party!

This Christmas has been nice and simple. My family came up to visit and it was so much fun to see Bennett really getting into it this year. I'm sure the next years will get even more fun as he learns more about Santa and what Christmas actually is about. For now, the wow's and surprised faces while he was opening presents was so fun to watch. The poor kiddo got sick a couple of days before Christmas and actually slept in our bed Christmas Eve so we could keep an eye on his fever and cough, but he still had a great time. He got one of those bouncy horses from Santa and was so excited to see it Christmas morning! I remember how excited I used to get and now I'm just as excited to see my kids' faces each Christmas. I am truly going to cherish each Christmas because I know childhood will not last forever.

I also hit "full term" status, or 37 weeks, the week of Christmas. So, like I said, bring it on baby boy! I'm so ready to meet this sweet boy already. And bring it on, 2015! We have a birthday to celebrate, a birth and new family member to welcome, Jeff will be traveling to the Dominican Republic and Africa on mission trips, and I will be graduating with my Master's and turning 30! I'm sure there will be more fun things in there as well, but I'm just praising God for such a great year to look forward to!

The Year 2014:

Bennett turned one!

Mr. Spaghetti Face

Rodeo time in Houston

Daddy back from Africa!

Happy Easter!

Guess what!!

#2 is on the way!

Soon-to-be Family of Four

18-month-old Bennett

Happy 30th Birthday, Daddy!

Adding another boy to the family!

Jeff's early Christmas present!

My handsome rodeo boys!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Full Term!

Merry Christmas!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year, y'all! May your year be filled with wonderful blessings you didn't even know you had in store!

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

~ James 1:17

Let There Be Peace on Earth

... and let it begin with me...

Our church had a Christmas musical special Sunday, and those lyrics are what stood out to me the most. It reminds me of other great advice I've heard over the years. Like, "Be the change you want to see in the world," which has been attributed to Gandhi. Or Mother Theresa's simple belief that, "Peace begins with a smile." Unfortunately, I don't see world peace ever truly manifesting itself as we all picture it. Our world is just too fallen. But, in each one of our small corners of the world, we can begin to spread love and peace to those around us in hopes that it will be contagious and spread. However, there is more to it than just "paying it forward" or doing something nice for another person. Yes, that is the action of peace, but the spirit of peace is something that can be much more effective. When good deeds and acts of kindness are completed with a spirit of peace and unconditional love behind them, the effect of those actions are multiplied and it gives the one helped something more satisfying to pass along to the next person. Funny thing about the gifts of peace, hope, and love - their purest source comes from God alone. No matter how much I love my children, or how much I hope to bring peace to a family quarrel, I will never be able to replicate the perfect peace that comes from knowing our perfect God. This Christmas season, and throughout the year, please do continue to help others, to smile at them, and to show them love regardless of their differences from you, but be sure to pass on something a little more; something with a lasting impact - share with others the hope and peace you have because of the One whom we celebrate this time of year (no, not Santa) - Jesus Christ!

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled; neither let it be afraid." - John 14:27

At the Christmas Parade

And sometimes the best way for you to spread peace is to hold onto peace yourself in the midst of chaos. Easier said than done, right? Those lyrics this weekend were a great reminder to not just spread the peace I have, but also simply where to get more of it! I'm exhausted, my body hurts (this baby seems so heavy!), and I'm having a hard time finding the motivation to finish my thesis before baby gets here. Thank goodness it's not due until February! Though, I don't know where the motivation will come from between now and then either. Anyway, this has all led me to a place of daily frustration. Basically, some days I feel like the world's worst mother because my almost-two-year old really knows how to push my buttons at times and chasing him around has become a task with my big belly in the way. I feel like every time I try to put my feet up to relax a bit, he's into something I told him not to touch, or do, or lick, or eat... whatever.

Happy Thanksgiving!

One day, a little over a week ago, was particularly taxing. It was just non-stop disobedience and by the end of the day when Jeff came home, I wanted to hide in a dark room from my little "darling." I had yelled way more than I wanted and at one point asked him to just go away and leave me alone because I couldn't take the whiny orneriness anymore! I felt so bad later, I wanted to cry. Poor little bubs gave me an unfortunate chance to redeem myself that very night. He woke up around midnight crying. I went into his room and he was crying, "Poop! Poop! No!" It smelled kind of funky so I just thought he pooped his pants. That was until he showed me what "poop" he was talking about. He had puked all over his bed! I felt horrible for him! After calling in reinforcements (Jeff got up and cleaned up all the puke), I cleaned off the kid, gave him some water, and laid him in our bed. My poor baby threw up a couple more times, but he was keeping water down and wasn't running a temp. It was his first time to really throw up like that, minus his infant spitting up days, but I wasn't too worried. Just felt so bad for him. I held him while he threw up and kept crying, "No! No!" The same way he does when he pees or poops in his big boy undies, like he's in trouble. I had to explain to him that he wasn't in trouble. When he finally got to sleep, he was taking up the whole bed (yes, I actually gave up my giant pregnancy pillow for a night so he could sleep with us!) and he wanted to cling to me all night. I don't blame him. Throwing up SUCKS. By morning, we were cuddled on the couch together so that I could comfortably hold him sitting up, with my big belly in the way, while he slept. I hate that he had that stomach bug, but it sort of gave me a chance to make up for my bad attitude that day. Yes, my son was being a brat, but I'm still working on the patience to handle it these days. Reflecting back on my reaction as a mom to give up my sleep and sleeping space to console my sick child and keep an eye on him while he slept, reassures me that I don't always get it wrong.

The Waylan Family

For my fellow exhausted mamas out there, don't dwell on those days when you feel you are at your worst. Instead, draw encouragement from those times you got it right and were the only one your child wanted in a time of need. We aren't perfect (and neither are our beautiful, little angels), but by golly, we sure can love the fire out of our kids!

The Barros Family

And, by the way, I did get the stomach bug from Bennett. Worst. Day. Ever. The discomfort of being almost nine months pregnant and having to deal with fever, chills, body aches, and an upset stomach with a baby boy to kick it is pure torture... Thank God it only lasted 24 hours! I don't think I could have made it through a week or two of a full-on flu!

Thanksgiving with family was marvelous, though, and went by way too quickly! I can't believe it is already time to see them again and Christmas is already next week! I'm so thankful they are coming to me again (and that we are yet another week closer to baby time!). We have Christmas, then New Year, Bennett's birthday party, then a baby! Of course, baby boy could choose to make his debut anytime between now and then. I just want to make it through Bennett's birthday party, then he can came as early as that night if he wishes!

Bring on the Holidays!

32 weeks with #2

If womb life is any indication on how this baby boy's personality is going to be, then he is going to be one hyper-active, pain in the butt, night owl who is going to be ready to wrestle his brother before he can walk. Seriously. This kid is non-stop, heavyweight action. And by heavy, I mean, holy cow, this baby feels like he is just going to fall out some days! He's still got at least five more weeks of baking to do, but after that, he can come whenever he pleases because I do not remember this much discomfort so early in the game with Bennett. In fact, as I'm typing this I feel like I'm getting bruised on the inside with his kicks and punches! Just two years ago, around this time in my first pregnancy, I was going to a college football game in Boulder with my family and doing just fine. Now, I can barely get through a grocery shopping trip without wishing I could sit down (and knowing that I will be sore later). This second pregnancy has been without complications so far, thank God, but has certainly been much more uncomfortable and has caused me to force myself to just sit down and put my feet up at times for fear of bringing on contractions too early. I hate being treated like an invalid just because I'm pregnant and having people tell me what I should and shouldn't do, but at this stage, I think I'll just suck it up and allow people to do things for me! Ain't no shame in that game, right?

In all honesty, I am so blessed to even be able to get pregnant and to be growing another healthy baby. I can't wait to meet him and for him to join our little family!  It won't be long now and I'm actually looking forward to labor (shush, I know I'm crazy)! But it means that he will be here soon! I'm so anxious to meet him and see what he looks like! Adorable, I'm sure, but the anticipation is still exciting.

Baking cookies!

Sooo looking forward to having ALL of my family in town for Thanksgiving this year. It was looking like we were going to spend it apart because I couldn't bear the thought of a five-hour car ride to Miami this year (sorry, extended fam!), but they are coming here first to celebrate with us! It's been since August since we've seen any of them, so I am excited and so grateful that my family is coming to me this year. Considering I'll be right at full term during Christmas, I am obviously staying home. Not sure what the family plans are, but my mom is talking about coming up to help me out. At first I wanted to say no because that will be a long time to stay before baby gets here and we don't have a guest room anymore, but the closer I get to baby time, the more I want my mommy! It's hard to take it easy when you have a toddler to chase around, holidays to worry about, and a thesis to work on, so I am grateful for the help. My mom was the biggest help when Bennett came, so I know I don't want to do this without her!

Playtime!

Morning "coffee" with Daddy

Have I mentioned that my little toddler is exhausting? He is, but he is also such a ham and really knows how to crack me up while making me angry all at the same time! His vocabulary is getting crazy and he is an expert little parrot! So we now have to watch everything we say and do! We are still doing the potty training thing, but unfortunately, I'm too exhausted and easily frustrated at times to go full force. The great thing is that he pees mostly in the toilet! He can stay dry all day if I take him to the bathroom enough. The two issues are that he doesn't like to tell me when he needs to go (so I need to remember to take him a lot) and he refuses to poop in the toilet. We will sit on there forever waiting and nothing, but as soon as I put his pull up or undies back on, he poops... Perhaps I will have the energy to figure this problem out after the baby gets here?? For now, I think he has done a pretty good job and done really well for how inconsistent we've been with it (he still wears diapers when we go out and we are at church and stuff a lot). He picked up the whole potty thing really quickly (M&Ms sure do help). So for now, I am just going to do my best with it and keep praising him for using the toilet. For now, everything is just one day at a time in this house.

Dressing himself :)

"Helping" make dinner

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all! :)

Trick or Treat! Smell My... Wait, What?

It's Day 2 of potty training here in the Barros household and I'm doing my best to hold down the fort. We are currently at a standstill as we wait out the toddler's next move. His strategy seems to be holding it as long as possible before slightly wetting his "big boy undies." He then proceeds to run up to me shouting, "No!" while trying to simultaneously remove said undies and run to the bathroom. From there it's at least another 10-15 minutes of playing with toilet paper and nonsensical talking before he finally lets it loose and finishes the job. To date, we have three potties in the toilet. Zero #2's. While I introduced him to the potty months ago, I had not planned to take on this mission just yet. Here's my report on why I felt it a good idea to exhaust myself with this endeavor:

It was last week. A Saturday morning I believe. The husband rose early to go feed his new horse. In the process he managed to awaken the toddler. I heard him fuss for a minute after his dad closed the front door, but there was silence afterwards. Assuming he had gone back to sleep, I, too, closed my eyes again. Not much time had passed before I checked the video monitor to see if the toddler was in his bed back asleep. No sign of him. He must be quietly playing in his room, I presumed. So, I took my time getting up, putting in my contacts, brushing my teeth, the usual. From there I make my way to his room. He hears me on the move and yells, "Ma!" I'm coming, I'm coming, I think as I waddle his direction. As soon as I get to his door, he points to where his books are thrown all over the floor and keeps saying "Ew! Yuck!" The room smells like poop. The toddler is completely naked. Great. It turns out the little creature had removed his clothing, his diaper (but at least he threw it in the trash!), and because he couldn't figure out how to put another diaper on (there was evidence he had tried), he decided it was a good idea to POOP ON THE FLOOR. It didn't just make on the floor, however. He had also managed a nice pile of poop on one of his books. I believe the title of the book was called, "You're My Miracle." Yup. That's exactly what I was thinking at that moment... I guess this kid is going to make a good outdoorsman because you could tell he had plopped a squat and pooped in a nice neat pile (mostly). So... I got everything cleaned up (including the toddler), threw away the book, and started my awesome morning...

This kid... I'm not sure what's more exhausting. Potty training him or dealing with him taking his diaper off every chance he gets. So, I finally gave in and started the official potty training. I know he will regress after little brother gets here, but I might as well get the ball rolling if I'm picking up poop and cleaning pee sheets already (yes, he has also taken his diaper off in the middle of the night and wet the bed...). We woke up at seven this morning (he slept in a diaper) and he had a full diaper and a poop. I put undies on him and they are still dry at almost 10 AM. I've sat him on the pot several times this morning to no avail. Guess we will just continue to wait it out!

In other news, as you may have heard, Jeff bought himself a horse! It's a six-year-old painted named Apache. He is sweet, but not completely saddle broke just yet. So, he is going through training as well! We are hoping he makes a good family horse for the boys to ride when they get older. Right now, it is really Jeff's pet and project. It will be a few months before I get to enjoy our new family pet! Probably not a good idea to go horseback riding right before (or right after) giving birth.

Update on Camp Potty: Bennett just peed all over my carpet. Not even 60 seconds after he had told me he needed to potty and we sat on the toilet for a while! Again with the "No!" yelling as he is peeing his pants and looking at me... Good thing I have my little carpet cleaner sitting out and ready to go! (Did you really think I could write a blog post in one sitting with a potty training toddler running loose?)

Then, of course, there is Halloween to talk about! Bennett went as a little bull rider, Jeff as a rodeo clown, and me as a fat, pregnant lady. Bennett was adorable and it was so cute seeing him and daddy together in their costumes! Bennett couldn't get over the make-up on Jeff's face. Bennett helped me make my shirt with his little footsies. It was fun. He dressed up in his costume that Monday for Story Time at the library. Then we all dressed up for Kidfest at the church Wednesday night. That place was insane! There was tons of people from the community. It was awesome! We painted some pumpkins the next night, then just stayed indoors Halloween night, ate a yummy dinner, and passed out candy. I think Bennett had more fun handing out candy to trick-or-treaters than he did getting candy on Wednesday night! He loved seeing everyone in their costumes and making animal noises at the ones dressed up like animals. Every time the door bell rang, he ran to the door, opened it and shouted "Trick or Treat!" Then told everyone Hi and Bye! It was hilarious.

My tough boys!

Trick or Treat!

Pumpkin Painting

We did get some unfortunate news this month. Jeff's dad is dealing with skin cancer right now. After losing his mom three years ago (this month!) to the big C-word, it was a pretty emotional thing to hear. Luckily, it sounds like they may be able to cut out all of the cancer because it is only on the surface. Jeff takes him to the city next week for the surgery, so please be praying that they get everything and for a quick recovery! Bennett loves playing with his Po-Po so we have to make sure he is in good working condition before letting our toddler tackle him again!

21 and 27 weeks

This pregnancy seems to be going both quickly and slowly. The great thing is that I have had no complications and my blood pressure has been perfect so far. I have been much more uncomfortable this time around. Baby boy is sitting so low and I'm already waddling around like a duck with hip dysplasia. I can't wait until he gets here! Just two more months! I can't wait to see what he looks like. Bennett was such a surprise with his blonde hair and blue eyes, so I'm am wondering how alike or different these handsome brothers are going to be. And, surprisingly, I'm really looking forward to the whole unmedicated, natural birth thing again! Trust me, I haven't forgotten how painful back labor was with Bennett, but I know that it is only a temporary pain and that the reward is totally worth it! My biggest worry now is finishing my Master's thesis and my final Master's course this winter! I have until February to finish my thesis and I only have one chapter completed. I was actually giving myself a little pep talk in the shower last night as I soaked my aching back in the warm water. I feel like the little engine that could, repeating, "I think I can. I think I can," as I chug along. No worries, right? Just have the holidays to worry about, a toddler to keep alive and potty train, Christmas AND a birthday party to plan and shop for, my Master's degree to complete, and a baby to finish growing. All while my patience and energy continues to wear thinner and thinner as January approaches and my big belly gets in the way. How does anyone make it through life, or even the day, without having a personal relationship with Jesus to turn to? Seriously.

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work. - 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

Why I Love Belly Buttons

My Bennett Belly

Belly buttons are amazing. No, seriously. They are a scar of life that every human shares. A reminder that we all grew and were formed in the same way. Currently, with my growing belly, I am able to see the inside of my belly button. For those who are or have been pregnant out there, you know what I'm talking about. For hairy-bellied men like my husband, they will never see the inside of their belly button (and probably never get all the lint out)! For those of us who have seen our belly buttons "up close," you'll notice just how much it really looks like a scar. The skin in there is kind of bunched up and shiny looking. Like an old scar. Just for reminiscing's sake, I'll sometimes examine an old scar on my body and remember the way in which I obtained it. What I was doing. How much it hurt. How long it took to heal. I have a small scar on my cheek where I scratched at my chicken pox when I was six. There's a very thin white line on my shin where I slipped on a rock walking across a river sometime in grade school. I also have a scar on my wrist where a hot biscuit pan got me while I was waitressing in college. While scars may hurt at the time, it can be fun to have them as reminders.

So, I found myself doing the same thing while admiring my belly button the other day! Okay, so I didn't sit down on the couch just to stare specifically at my belly button, but I was having fun watching my belly jump as baby boy kicked and flipped in there. That's when I thought, "Hmm, I can see my belly button again." This happened with my last pregnancy, so it's not like it was a surprise. But this time I got to thinking about what a belly button really is and was reminded of seeing my first baby boy for the first time. Seeing that umbilical cord attached to his belly - his lifeline to me that had kept him nourished and growing for nine months. I remember watching Jeff cut the cord. He said it was tough! That was a serious connection Bennett and I had. Then I remembered watching that cord turn black and start to wither away over the next few days and weeks. Bennett's little belly button must have taken some time to heal because I swear the kid had a little black scar in there until he was at least a year old. I often wondered if it ever bothered him. Sometimes scars hurt or are sore during the healing process. He never seemed bothered by it and of course he couldn't tell me anything about it, but I still wondered.

Toddler Belly

Then I got to thinking back a little further. Almost 30 years further. Of course I can't remember my life as a new human being, but I know that my belly button went through the same thing. At one point, it is what connected me to my mother and how I grew in her belly. I'm also reminded by the fact that I was a complete surprise for two teenagers back in the 80s and how grateful I am that my mother allowed that bond between us to grow and loved me even before she met me. For a woman who said she would never have any kids, I was blessed with one great mother (and now a great Gammy). She isn't perfect and she was not the perfect parent, but she was perfect for me and my siblings. Thank goodness there is no such thing as a perfect parent, because it takes just a bit of the worry away. And I'm thankful for this little scar on my belly that proves, no matter how crazy things may get between us or how we might bicker at times, that we once shared a bond so strong and important that it was what kept me alive and growing. I may be a grown adult now, but I was once dependent on her and relied on my parents for everything. Even as a child, it was their food, shelter, and love that kept me alive and growing.

Current Growing Belly!

And that's why I love belly buttons... They are a reminder of connections. That obvious connection from your belly to your mother in the womb, but also that connection to your parents, to your children, and ultimately, to all other humans. Plus, baby belly buttons are just so dang adorable... how could you not love them?!

Baby Belly!

For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother's womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works, 
And that my soul knows very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
~ Psalm 139:13-16